Did the thought of swaying pique your curiosity? Have you ever approached it with your partner? Maybe soft swap is your first step.
The swinger lifestyle has long been taboo, however, everyone is skeptical about it. Whether accepted or not! Of course, swinging isn’t for everyone. but for those who want to play Softswap can be a good first step in testing the waters.
Maybe the reason why jerks tend to whisper is because we really don’t understand. Regular swingers are often part of a community of like-minded and fun people in their own way. As long as it’s consensual and everyone is having a good time. There is no place to judge.
Of course, increasing the idea of dating your partner can be daunting. Especially if you’ve never talked about it as a couple before. [Read: The do’s and don’ts of swinging you have to follow]
First of all, the fundamentals of swinging
If you don’t know The swinging lifestyle involved couples engaging in sexual activity with other couples. In some cases, they invited singles to bed called unicorns. There is no romantic feeling associated with swinging, and there are boundaries for each couple.
For example, a couple might agree that they can have sex with the other. but can’t kiss because it looks too intimate It may be that the couple is not having in-depth sex with the other partner. Instead, they did other activities. The swing in pairs can be done in any way you like. But it requires consent from all levels and both partners must be ready and comfortable with everything that happens.
Couples often use swinging websites to find other couples, attend invite-only parties, or find like-minded couples through word of mouth. Of course, safety must be taken into account. which is why many couples The couple therefore adhered to the official website. [Read: The sexy swinging lifestyle: How to make it work for you]
So what is softswap?
As described by lifestyle people The soft switch is It’s a lighter style of swing compared to the “baby glove swing”. A “full exchange” where two or more couples exchange partners and have full sex with them. Soft exchanges are most associated with flirting, kissing, touching, and oral sex. But there is absolutely no sex.
Softswap is the gateway to serious swings. First timers usually do a soft swap initially to gauge their swing comfort level. and check if they can keep pushing their boundaries. The result is that soft swaps tend to make or break your swinging lifestyle. Many couples also use soft swaps to determine if this is something they want to continue. If after trying a smoother version One partner did not want to continue. The concept of swing will be discarded. [Read: Threesome tips and 20 things you HAVE to know before entering one]
How to approach the concept of soft exchange with your partner.
If you’ve never talked about swinging with your partner before. Approaching this idea would certainly cause serious concern. Think about these points before you go into specifics.
1. Break it to them
Asking your partner to swing can be the hardest part of the process. Presumably, you may experience different reactions. If you just open it, then before you break the question. Here’s what you need to consider:
What do you know about swinging?
Your wildest imagination is based on real data. movies you watch Or something that comes purely from your imagination? Knowing what’s going on at a swinger’s party will help you cope with expectations. You will also be responsible for explaining. [Read: How to start swinging with your partner]
What are your thoughts on the swing or softswap?
Do they know this? Are they thinking of doing it? Did they mention this in your talks? Knowing what your partner thinks about their lifestyle can help you decide whether it’s easy or hard to ask them to join.
in case they are interested You will need to determine how you will participate in the swingers’ party. This process requires a lot of research and pair discussion. Consider the extent and what you want to experience. [Read: The 10 rules of swinging]
the right time
Swingers confess that you are interested in the lifestyle, whether you are a young couple in a long relationship. or old enough to allow children Yours start a new life on their own. The interest in exchange arises from the need to add adventure in the relationship. Therefore, it is important to know whether your current lifestyle can accommodate this need for practice.
2. Know your apprehension as a couple
Some partners may oppose this idea for a variety of personal reasons. It’s up to you as the initiator. So set things straight and honest about your expectations and motivation to try this new action. Honesty will help you cope with those paranoias. And it helps you set your boundaries in case you try to swing. [Read: A couple’s guide to swapping partners with another couple]
Some general insights about soft swings and alternations include:
- jealousy The partner may disagree and get angry at your proposal or thinking of changing a partner. Remember that you are acting as a couple and with each other’s consent.
- STDs This is a valid concern and a real risk due to the nature of the lifestyle. Despite this concern Swingers also follow strict health and safety rules because they are aware of their own risks. Take precautions or request test results to reassure you of this concern.
- Privacy and Security What if someone took a picture and published it on the internet? This happens, but rarely if you’re concerned about privacy. Please be assured that swingers are strict with photography and other media. at their party You can also choose an amateur swinger’s party, which can be smaller and more intimate to protect your privacy. [Read: How to have better sex: 13 ways to change the way you make love]
3. Do research and gather information about soft exchanges.
Once you have discussed and explained your concerns and concerns, It’s time to gather real facts about soft trades and swingers lifestyle. This will help dispel any misinformation you may have about your lifestyle. Knowing what’s going on at the swingers’ party will help you prepare and adjust to your comfort. In case you really decide to join
Despite popular opinion that money changers are just sex freaks. They respect each other’s preferences and boundaries very much. They have rules that you must follow related to sexual contact and general decency that you won’t find in your local dive bar. [Read: 9 Types of wild sex parties you can have at home]
The lifestyle isn’t just about sex. But it also acts as a support group with lots of love and relationship wisdom to share for your understanding. You’ll be surprised how much more social swing parties involve socializing than sex.
4. Talk about your boundaries as a couple.
What are you both happy about and aren’t you? What does your partner want you to do and what do you not want them to do? It is important to set boundaries and not violate them. A big part of the swing is trust. You have to be able to trust your partner to stick to the limits you agreed upon as a couple. Resisting them means you don’t respect your partner’s feelings.
Have an in-depth discussion on this subject. Then summarize and outline the boundaries you have agreed upon. [Read: A guide on effective communication in a relationship]
5. Set time and date
Once you are satisfied with the information you have and consider both your expectations and understanding. It’s time to set the date. Remember, you pick and choose from the wide range of swinger parties offered by online dating sites. Or you could ask a friend who is familiar with the lifestyle for advice.
6. Consistently building confidence in your partner
Even if your partner agrees and is dressed for the event, They may have some jittery feelings that might turn them away. It is up to you to reassure your partner that you are there with them. They don’t have to do anything uncomfortable. Also remind them that this is just a soft exchange. Compliment them and be cute throughout the event. [Read: 10 vital things a beginner should expect at a sex party]
7. Remember that anyone can back off if there’s too much stuff.
Always remind yourself and your partner that one can bail out of action if it proves too much to handle. No one is forced during soft exchanges. And you can switch to having sex with your own partner.
Switch from softswap to full swing
The next natural step after a softswap is to determine if you want to enter a full-fledged lifestyle. for some couples A single soft swap is enough to show them that they don’t want to keep doing things. If that’s the case, that’s fine. Swinging isn’t for everyone. And you are satisfied with your curiosity by giving it a try. [Read: 20 Hot sex ideas to blow your lover’s mind in bed]
It’s imperative that you sit in pairs after the event and ask questions. It’s important that you be honest with each other. It could be that one partner enjoyed the experience. but the other was not very enthusiastic. Don’t pretend you enjoyed it if you didn’t. If one partner doesn’t want to try again You must respect their wishes. Remember that your relationship is more important at the end of the day.
Your conversation will help resolve any issues. And it helps both of you decide what you think about going forward. You have tried something new![Read: 20 sexually enlightening movies all about sexuality]
Getting into the swinger lifestyle can be a gamble. But softswap helps you decide if it’s right for you or not. If you play your cards correctly You may experience the most intense and sexiest relationship possible.