idea to be ‘Comfortable friend’ doesn’t sound good, right? In one example, it is, but in another way It’s just life that pushes you together.
Friendship is a complicated thing. and comfortable friends? Is this what we want now?
We change and change with our lives. And it’s possible that the friend you started with may no longer be there. When I look at my friendship circle today It’s definitely much smaller. I have many friends But over time, some got married, some had children, some moved. And some of them disappeared from my life for no particular reason. Today I can count my true friends with one hand.
Am I sad about that? No way! It’s about quality, not quantity.
You will have different types of friends as you go through what they call life. But there is one type of friend that might confuse you a bit. I’m talking about a comfortable friend.[Read: Relationships of convenience and why people get into these]
What is the friend of convenience?
There are a couple of reasons why you’re uncomfortable being friends with someone or vice versa. One reason is a normal one that you can easily accept. And another reason is something you need to think carefully.
The first example is You are a friend of convenience because you just run in the same circle and go to the same place. For example, you might be friends with someone because they go to the same gym as you and you see each other a lot. You may be friends with someone because they are close to your partner. You might be friends with someone because they work in the same office as you.
In this case, you are a friend of comfort. Because it’s easy and because you collide often. without much exertion [Read: How to make new friends as an adult no matter where you are]
That’s a pretty good example.
The second example is slightly more negative. Actually, it’s much more negative.
You might be a comfortable friend because you or the other person has something that the other person wants. In this case, you’re being used and one of them has ulterior motives. [Read: How to handle friends that use you and learn to break the cycle]
Motivation could be anything. It could be that you’re “friends” with someone because they’re close to your crush and as a result you’re trying to get closer to them. You can be “friends” with someone because they influence the career you are trying to achieve. And you’re using your relationship to make a little more progress and help.
It could be anything and the focus is on one of you – it could be you with ulterior motives. So using your “friend” or maybe the other way around and you’re the one being used.
as you can see One example is acceptable and quite normal. Another example is slightly more selfish and can result in people being more selfish. one emotional pain [Read: How to stop being selfish, and hurting and using others]
Is this true friendship?
Can a friend of comfort be a true friend?
It depends. Would you try to meet this person if you weren’t forced to meet face to face? Do you have a lot in common? Do you really like spending time with them?
If you’re nodding your head “yes,” perhaps you’ve met accidentally and conveniently. But the result is a closer friendship. In many cases, most friendships begin. You don’t just bump into someone on the road as usual and boom! You’re chatting on social media and meeting up for coffee. You will usually meet someone through work. your social life Through mutual connection, in many ways, a comfortable friend is the beginning of friendship. [Read: 75 fun questions to ask a new friend and feel like BFFs in no time]
However, if we look at the second example, no, that’s not true friendship at all.
In this case, you’re using someone to get what you want. Or are you being used for someone else’s benefit? You will not choose to spend time with this person, or he will not choose to spend time with you. And as soon as you get what you want or they do, you may disappear from each other’s lives.
Pretty scary, right?
The point is, we are all human. And that means that sometimes We don’t often think about things. You may find yourself talking to someone you know honestly may help you get where you want to be. and without meaning You start a conversation that engages the other person to the point that they want to see you more. Friendship level [Read: How to spot selfish people and stop them from hurting you]
In that case, you can understand how a friendly situation can develop. You have to take a step back.
Using other people for personal gain is not okay. And it’s okay if someone does it for you.
The point is, how can you tell?
I’m not suggesting that you be paranoid and try to figure out if the friendships in your life fall into this category. I’m sure they aren’t. However, if you have someone in your life that you suspect isn’t as true as they suggest. or you are acting in this manner towards other people It’s time to sit down and really think carefully. about what happened [Read: 15 types of toxic friends who make you miserable and bring you down]
convenient friend or not It’s not worth wasting time on fake friendships. When you can go out there to develop true friendships with the people you are close with on a sincere level.
friendship is special I’ve learned this truth all my life. Yes, I lost friends for stupid reasons, and yes, I’ve been abused and betrayed by them too. But like I said before I have a small group who are cheerful and close to each other nowadays which I know I can rely on It’s not about the number of people in your circle. But about the quality of those people and how much you love them on a friendship level. [Read: Real friends vs. fake friends and how to tell them apart]
Friends are really the family that we choose for ourselves. But you have to choose wisely and make sure the people around you are steering your boat in the same direction as you. and not frantically piercing your back
You need to make sure you’re helping your friend lead them to where they want to go. And you don’t show selfish motivation.
Friendships that are not in parentheses are always close by. As long as the friendships in your life are in the first category, for example, you are friends because you are so close to each other, that’s fine. which is generally more negative. It might be time to start eliminating friendship circles and focusing on quality instead. [Read: 15 qualities of a good friend that sets them apart from the bad ones]
It’s better to have three or four real friends than having ten real friends who don’t really care about your needs. Of course, this also means you need to assess if you’re the best friend you can be friends with in your life. yours? because in the end Friendship is a two-way street! [Read: How to make more friends when you’re feeling lonelier than ever]
Friends of comfort are thrown together by circumstance, or are they developed from selfish desires. Examining the friendships in your life will help you identify any connections that are not completely genuine. by doing this You can devote your time and attention to cultivating real friendships and friendships that enrich your life. rather than being there for selfish interests.[Read: How to be a friend – The real art of true and meaningful friendships]
Fake friendships tend to happen from time to time. But learning to distinguish between a convenient friend and a true friend that comes into your life will help you focus on what you really need.