My Girlfriend Wants to Get Married, But I Don’t!

If she pressures you to put the ring on that finger before you’re ready. Here’s what you need to do to reduce conflict.

boyfriend wants to get married

Is your Facebook news feed full of wedding photos, engagement shoots, and “save the date”? Video? Does everyone around you seem to be bound? Your boyfriend is hinting that it might be time to settle down, get married, start a family. And spend all their lives together?

Man, hold your horse well. because when a wedding fly takes over a woman’s mind Only a sweet voice Only the wedding bells can get rid of them. But that doesn’t mean you have to give up and marry her just because you’re under pressure. [Read: 25 signs she’s just high on wedding fever]

Marriage is not just a tuxedo, flowers and lots of planning. It started our whole life together! You will have to deal with the bill. joint bank account marriage license and other responsibilities There are many that you may not have thought of!

But if you are confused between wanting to enjoy life as an unmarried friend and wanting to make your girlfriend happy This is what you should do.

First, find out why you still don’t want to get married.

The most common reason for not wanting to get married is because the situation is not “yes”?? But that doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with your life right now. You may not be mentally prepared to commit to one person forever because you are focused on your career. want to earn more want to do things, things.

Another reason you might feel unprepared is because you don’t instinctively feel like you want to marry. You may have done what most single men do, but deep inside you may not feel that marriage is right for you… maybe not, or not at all.

This may be due to seeing married people miserable. People who lose themselves in their partner or divorce rates are rising. It can also be a decision that you want to live with just one person. But no marriage involved. Just look at Kurt Russel and Goldie Hawn!

Finally, the most troubling reason you might not want to get married is because you don’t see your partner as the person you’re going to marry. This could sting both you and her. But when you feel that it’s not right You can’t force yourself to want something.

What do you do when she wants to be tied down but you don’t?

Knowing why you don’t want to marry her is one thing. But what do you do to please her and please her without arguing? Here are some suggestions.

#1 Think again. The thought of marriage can keep you off guard. And your initial instinct is to defend. You just got home from a stressful day. And your partner wants to talk about marriage?! You’re broke until payday. And your girlfriend wants to start planning a grand wedding?!

When the shock has subsided The best thing you can do is give it a little time to simmer it in a liqueur. Maybe your boyfriend has a point. Maybe the right time for marriage is because your life goals are fulfilling and you feel so right, just think about it, make a list of the pros and cons, who knows? You might even start to warm up to that idea. [Read: 20 reasons to get married and live happily ever after]

#2 Stall and buy time The previous point takes time. But it may take you more than a few days to think about it. Be honest with her and tell her that you need some time to warm up to the idea.

Remember, don’t act like you need a break, or she might think you don’t like the idea of ​​marriage until you break up with her! Give her a time frame, like a week or even a month. at least in this way Will you know when to expect an offer? “I don’t want to get married yet”?? talk.

#3 Don’t use the word “soon”?? The word “soon”?? like a time bomb You’ll keep her hopeful for days, weeks, or even months without a definitive answer! Soon for you it may take years. But she might think you mean you’ll have to make a decision within a few weeks. The vague promise of “coming soon” ?? It won’t make you both go anywhere. And it might make your girlfriend feel like you’ll eventually forget about the problem. And you know that’s just a battle waiting to happen.

Remember that if you delay too much Your partner may feel exhausted from waiting. Even worse, if she thinks you’re brooding. actually You’ve already made up your mind without telling her. Guys say what’s on your mind and don’t let her hang!

#4 Find out if it’s really a marriage. that your lover wants or not Sometimes relationships need “level up” ?? Once you’ve been with your partner for a while, things tend to seem monotonous. It’s possible your girlfriend thinks that’s the only way to get rid of monotony and enhance your relationship. It’s all about devoting yourself to planning your dream wedding, getting married, and going on a fun honeymoon.

But let’s see if it’s possible to console her with another upgrade. instead of getting married you can move together You can create a joint bank account. Or even find a pet that you can call your child.

Both of you can get a taste of the responsibilities of marriage without actually having to travel to the altar, so it’s a win-win. That way, you’ll also know if you’re a match now. Or have to fix a few problems first. [Read: 10 tips for couples who want to live together]

#5 If your partner is doing something to prevent you from marrying her. Let’s say so! Is she spending too much? Are her finances out of control? Does she seem emotionally immature? Does she trust you for all the housework? Instead of ignoring the problem and saying “It’s not you, it’s me” ?? Why not start a relationship assessment discussion? No one should be married prior to this discussion.

Relationship assessment conversations allow you to discuss where you are in a relationship. Did you both grow up together? Can you take care of each other? Is there something you are doing to prevent you from having a successful relationship? Is she as worried about your snoring as you are annoyed by her morning breath? No relationship is perfect, but at least you can explore your relationship deeply to help you figure out ways to make it even better. [Read: 12 signs you’re walking on eggshells in your love life]

#6 What if you don’t see yourself marrying your partner? As mentioned above This is probably the most regrettable thing you can tell your girlfriend. Although being in a relationship is the beginning of marriage. But there may be times when you realize that you love her. But you just don’t want to marry her.

There are many reasons for this. You may not see yourself with her for more than a few years. Or maybe your relationship is built on something that can’t wait in the near future. Maybe she feels like the right person now. But as you progress in your career You will be dispersed.

Maybe not really her That’s why you don’t want to get married. Maybe you just totally hate the idea of ​​marriage after seeing your loved one parting ways for their marriage to come to fruition. for whatever reason You have to be completely honest with her so that she doesn’t hold her hopes up.

[Read: 12 signs you may have commitment issues]

Any of the above tips can help you in your sensitive situation, stall if you have to. Who knows, maybe you won’t see yourself marrying her any time soon, but the sight of her walking towards the altar in white may become clearer. As your relationship progresses

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